Therapy for Personality Disorders
Therapy for Personality Disorders in Hampshire
Our personalities are unique and shape how we experience the world, other people, and even ourselves. These traits are what make us distinctive, but life also requires flexibility and the ability to adapt to change. When patterns of thinking, feeling, or behaving become too rigid, they can make everyday challenges and relationships harder to manage.
For some people, these long-standing patterns sometimes referred to as personality difficulties or personality disorders can make it difficult to cope. Individuals may rely on unhelpful coping mechanisms, struggle to maintain relationships, or find it hard to manage emotions, which can lead to stress, anxiety, or even panic attacks.
If you often find personal or professional relationships difficult, feel overwhelmed by strong emotions such as anger, or struggle to express your feelings, particularly during times of bereavement and grief, therapy can help. With the right support, personality-related difficulties can be managed effectively, helping you build resilience and improve your quality of life.
My therapy for personality disorders is compassionate, collaborative, and trauma-informed. Rather than pathologising people, I aim to understand the underlying experiences and needs that shaped their ways of coping. Over time, therapy for personality disorders can help you lead a calmer, more fulfilling life.
I’m Dr. Sonney Gullu-McPhee, an HCPC & BPS Registered Chartered Clinical Psychologist. With over 15 years of extensive training and experience, I provide bespoke psychological care to adults seeking meaningful change. Join me at my Petersfield clinic or online across the UK for bespoke therapy.
Book a 15-minute complimentary consultation via phone or email, or by filling out a form.
Understanding Personality Disorders or issues
Personality disorders or issues are complex and long-lasting patterns of thinking, feeling, and behaving that can affect mood, relationships, and everyday life.
Our personalities begin forming early in life through a combination of genetic influences and the environments we grow up in. Research shows that certain traits may be inherited, such as sensitivity to stress or emotional reactivity. However, the way these traits develop often depends on early experiences such as attachment relationships, family dynamics, or exposure to trauma.
In this way, genes and environment continually interact: a child with a genetic tendency toward sensitivity may thrive in a nurturing, supportive environment, but struggle if raised in one marked by neglect, criticism, or instability. Over time, these early adaptations can become fixed patterns that cause difficulties in adulthood, particularly in relationships, self-esteem, and coping with stress. This is why many people seek therapy for personality disorders, as professional support can help them better understand these patterns and develop healthier ways of coping.
A Compassionate and Trauma-Informed Approach to Therapy for Personality Disorders
Many people who live with what is described as a “personality disorder” have histories of trauma, neglect, or invalidating environments. Rather than seeing your difficulties as a flaw or pathology, I understand them as survival strategies that once helped you cope but may now cause distress.
During therapy for a personality disorder, a trauma-informed approach means:
- Compassion over judgment – recognising that your patterns are understandable responses to past experiences.
- Understanding triggers – exploring how early relational wounds shape current reactions.
- Focusing on strengths – helping you build resilience and reconnect with your values.
- Creating safety – ensuring therapy is a non-judgmental space where you feel seen and respected.
This perspective shifts the focus away from “what is wrong with you” to “what happened to you” and most importantly, how we can support you to heal.
Challenges Addressed in Therapy for Personality Disorders
Personality difficulties can show up in different ways depending on the person. Some people may feel emotions too strongly and fear abandonment, while others may avoid closeness altogether, or become highly self-critical. These patterns are not “character flaws.” They are ways of coping that may have once been necessary but now feel limiting or painful. Importantly, they can shift with the right support.
My therapy for personality disorders and issues are tailored to your needs but often focus on:
Many people with personality-related difficulties feel emotions more strongly than others. This can lead to sudden shifts in mood, anger outbursts, or feeling flooded by sadness or anxiety. Therapy for personality disorders helps you learn skills to regulate these emotions and feel more in control.
A deep fear of being left, rejected, or “not good enough” can make relationships feel unstable and painful. Therapy for personality disorders provides tools to build healthier attachments and a stronger sense of self-worth, reducing the cycle of clinginess or withdrawal.
Some people may struggle with relationships that feel “all or nothing,” while others keep their distance to avoid being hurt. Personality disorder therapy explores these patterns, helping you develop safer and more balanced ways of connecting with others.
Past experiences of neglect, betrayal, or criticism may make it hard to feel safe in relationships. Therapy offers a consistent, safe space where you can rebuild trust and learn to open up without fear of being judged.
Holding yourself to impossibly high standards can create constant pressure and feelings of failure. Therapy helps you challenge perfectionism, reduce self-criticism, and develop more compassionate and realistic expectations.
Behaviours such as overspending, binge eating, or substance use may be used to escape overwhelming emotions. Therapy for personality disorders helps you identify triggers, find healthier coping strategies, and build greater stability.
A shaky sense of self can leave you feeling unsure of who you are, easily influenced by others, or plagued with self-doubt. Therapy for personality disorders strengthens your identity, builds confidence, and helps you reconnect with your authentic self.
Pulling away from others can feel like protection, but it often deepens loneliness and low mood. Therapy helps you gradually reconnect, build safe relationships, and feel less isolated.
Harsh self-judgment and deep shame can keep you stuck in negative cycles. Compassion-Focused Therapy (CFT) and schema work support you in developing kindness toward yourself and breaking free from self-critical patterns.
Treatments for Personality Disorder Issues
Therapy is one of the most effective ways to stabilise mood and behaviour, improve self-awareness, and develop healthier coping strategies. Because each person’s difficulties are unique, I use an integrative approach tailored to your needs. Here are some of the therapies I use to support clients in building resilience, managing symptoms, and creating lasting change.
Cognitive Behaviour Therapy can be helpful for certain personality disorders, particularly those with avoidant, paranoid, or obsessive-compulsive traits. In this therapy, I will help you identify unhelpful thoughts and behaviours. During CBT, I will teach you better coping skills and help you overcome emotional hurdles.
Schema Therapy explores deep-rooted patterns and beliefs formed in childhood that continue to shape how you see yourself and others. By identifying these schemas, therapy helps you create lasting change, improve relationships, and strengthen self-esteem.
CFT supports people who struggle with shame, self-criticism, or harsh inner judgment. It helps you develop self-compassion and balance your emotional systems so you feel calmer, safer, and more connected.
Mindfulness practices are integrated across therapies to support emotional regulation, increase self-awareness, and reduce stress.
EMDR is a trauma-focused therapy that helps process painful memories and reduce their emotional impact. For many people with personality-related difficulties, unresolved trauma contributes to current struggles. EMDR can help reprocess these experiences and create space for healing.
DBT provides practical skills for managing overwhelming emotions, coping with distress, and improving relationships. It is especially helpful for those who experience emotional intensity or self-destructive behaviours.
My Therapy for Personality Disorders Process
Personality Disorder Therapy with Dr McPhee
Personality disorders can make it harder to feel connected, enjoy fulfilling relationships, and maintain a strong sense of self-worth, all of which can affect overall quality of life. However, you can seek therapy for personality disorders or issues and change the way you view life and your reactions towards yourself, others and situations.
As your Clinical Psychologist, I can guide you through this transformation. In my sessions, I offer you a safe and non-judgmental space to process your feelings, triggers and emotions. For your convenience, I offer online and in-person sessions from my Hampshire clinic.
Call, email or fill out the form to connect with me today for a brief 15-minute complimentary consultation.
Therapy may not remove personality difficulties altogether, but it can bring about meaningful and lasting change. With the right support, many people learn to regulate emotions, build healthier relationships, and live more fulfilling lives.
No. You don’t need a formal diagnosis to benefit from therapy. Many people simply notice long-term struggles with emotions, relationships, or self-esteem, and therapy can still help significantly.
Therapy length varies depending on your goals and the complexity of your difficulties. Short-term therapy may help with specific coping strategies, while longer-term therapy is often recommended for deep-rooted patterns.
Yes. In some cases, medication prescribed by a psychiatrist can complement therapy. I collaborate with other healthcare professionals where appropriate to support your treatment plan.
Yes. Research shows that online therapy for personality disorders can be just as effective as in-person sessions. You can choose whichever format feels most comfortable and accessible for you.
The first session is an assessment where we explore your experiences, current challenges, and goals for therapy. From there, we develop a tailored plan that feels safe, supportive, and focused on your needs.
Evidence-based approaches such as Schema Therapy, DBT, CBT, Compassion Focused Therapy (CFT), EMDR, and mindfulness-based strategies have been shown to be highly effective in treating personality-related difficulties.
Please schedule a complimentary 15-minute consultation to explore how we might work together.